I can't get hard is it because of porn

I Can’t Get Hard, Is It Because of Porn?

Reassuring and useful audio advice for a reader who can’t get hard (it’s not because of porn).

So I and my girlfriend have been together for about a year now, after we met last year in sixth form. We initially held off having sex, but we tried to do it yesterday. I thought it would be great, but last night I just couldn’t get a full erection. I told her I was just tired, maybe nervous, but she didn’t like it and thought I didn’t find her attractive. I don’t know why that happened, I do find her attractive, and I don’t know what to do about it. I usually can get an erection when masturbating or to porn, could that be causing a problem, coz I read on this website called yourbrainonporn about porn-induced ed?? Please tell me what I can do Bish, cheers, I just don’t want this to happen again next time u know?

I answered this as a kind of podcast!

Read more about hard ons. They are random and respond really quickly to stress. So if you are stressing about your body and your relationship then that is going to kill your boner quickly.

There are lots of different kinds of sex that don’t require an erection (and can be just as enjoyable or even more enjoyable). Putting less pressure on a penis to get hard means that it’s actually more likely that penises will get hard.

Comment below if you like. I moderate all comments before they appear, just so you know!

See what else you can find out about today!

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If you’re over 18 and would like an advanced version of BISH check out my podcast Culture Sex Relationships. Also I’ve written a sex advice book for adults with Meg-John Barker called A Practical Guide to Sex available wherever you get books. We also did some zines to help you to figure out what you want from sex and relationships. They are at our website.

If you are an educator please don’t just show this website in class, they aren’t designed to be used as teaching resources. Instead, facilitate your own really great RSE with my resources at bishtraining.com.

I’ve been a sex and relationships educator since 1999 (with a background in youth and community work). In that time I’ve taught and given advice about sex and relationships with thousands of young people in person and millions online. I’ve worked with many charities, local governments, schools and youth organisations facilitating training and workshops. My two books, Enjoy Sex (How, When, and If You Want To) and Can We Talk About Consent? are widely available around the world. I’m also a member of the World Association for Sexual Health. Justin Hancock

Justin Hancock has been a trained sex and relationships educator since 1999. In that time he’s taught and given advice about sex and relationships with thousands of young people in person and millions online. Find out more about Justin here

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