On why it’s not a great idea to compare your breasts, bum, tum, vulva and skin to those you see in porn or modelling. They probably don’t look like you and even if they did they are made to look better.
They don’t look like you (probably)
Women that we see in on telly, in films, in women’s magazine, in men’s magazines, in celebrity magazines, in adverts, in music videos are not representative of most women. Women come in all different shapes, sizes and ages but (in the UK) we only tend to see a small selection of young women who the media think, that we think, are attractive.
People who make porn and sexy modelling have a very particular idea about what the viewer finds sexually attractive, so the same as above can also be said for porn and for ‘glamour modelling.’ Although it’s a bit more complicated.
In porn there is something for everyone and if someone wants to watch something then a producer will try and make a market available (though apparently there is no clown porn). This means that there is porn which features (for example) bigger women (BBW), older women (‘mature’ or MILF or GILF), women with small or large breasts and porn with non-cis women. So there is a lot more diversity of different kinds of women in porn than in most mainstream media.
However the porn and sexual images that sell the most tend to have similar looking women (which I’ll talk about below). Because this is the most popular there is more of it (and because they can afford to give away free samples and/or their stuff gets pirated more there is more of it around for free) this is often the kind of thing that people see when they first come across sexually explicit images (pardon the pun). There are lots and lots of these images around and sometimes people find it hard to avoid.
You can also see it in daily newspapers (this is known as glamour modelling).
How to Feel Better About Your Body
Breasts
Many women in porn and especially glamour modelling (page 3, lad’s mags etc) have bigger than average breasts. Some have had surgery to make them bigger. For instance Katie Price (also known as Jordan). Some are simply women who just happen to have big boobs. People can also have surgery in other areas, for example to make their lips look pouty *MWAH*
Read more about breasts and chests
Pubic hair
Most porn actors and models either trim all of their pubic hair off or they trim it. Many women like to do this in real life but many women also like to let it grow too. Pubic and armpit hair styles in porn are changing, so it’s not uncommon to see women with underarm hair.
Here’s more about Pubic Hair
Photoshop
Photos are also altered afterwards, this is what is meant by ‘photoshopping’ or ‘airbrushing’. This can be used to get rid of spots, or rashes or any ‘imperfections’ on the skin. They can also be used to make breasts look a little bit bigger and waists a bit smaller. They can also be used to make the wallpaper look a bit less minging.
Posing and acting skills
Remember that when you see models, they are posing in ways to make their (already ‘nice’ looking) bodies better. So you aren’t going to see many pictures of models sitting down, reading a paper and eating a packet of crisps.
Looking good on camera is a skill. For glamour modelling the models need to pose to look as busty as they can whilst also looking slim around the middle. There’s a lot of breathing in and arching of the back going on. I’m pretty sure they don’t do that when they are down the pub, or in Sainsburys.
People actually having sex on camera have to think about all this stuff too. They have to do it in positions so that the camera can see everything that is going on, but they also need to try and pose to look good whilst they are having sex at the same time as making the sex look like feels amazing. They have to do this even if they aren’t really feeling it: it’s work for them. Tough job!
You might like An Educational Guide to Porn
In real life, they’re real
So remember that although these images of women looking very similar are everywhere try not to compare yourself to them. These women fart, belch, eat crisps, go to the toilet, have spots, have ‘I feel ugly’ days, wear comfortable rather than sexy pants, don’t always wash their hair, have hairy legs, chew their nails, eat chips, eat with their mouths open, spill food down themselves too: just like everyone else (or maybe just me).
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© Justin Hancock, 2023
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Justin Hancock has been a trained sex and relationships educator since 1999. In that time he’s taught and given advice about sex and relationships with thousands of young people in person and millions online. He’s a member of the World Association for Sexual Health.
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I’m glad you like it! Do tell people about it (if you are able to).
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