“My boyfriend always wants sex and I feel like I have to have sex to make him happy, it’s not like he makes me do it I choose to but I feel like I’m letting him down if I don’t. I’m 14 he’s 15”

We might think that everyone else is enjoying sex more than us, but they’re not. Many people have a lack of pleasure from sex, even if they like solo sex.

Why do I always have vaginal discharge all the time. I’m only 15.and whenever I go to the toilet my knickers are always soaking wet, please help me, because I’m worried about it. It has a bit of an odour too.

To go on top without hurting their penis it’s a good idea to make sure that the penis is pretty hard. Then guide it in with your hand. Move slowly at first rather than bouncing up and down like you’re on a trampoline. Then keep checking in with them during sex that it’s comfortable, noticing their body language, facial expressions and how they might guide you with their hands and words. More detail below (obvs).

I’m 14 and I got stretch marks from my growth spurt on my back and I don’t know how people will react. None of the other guys have stretch marks is there a way of reducing their visibility?

Here’s advice to a guy who wants to show someone he cares for her even though he forced her to have sex. CN – talks about rape but there are no descriptions of anything.

Advice for someone who is being slut shamed at school. A must read if you like to gossip about people or judge people for their sex lives. (Another long one, sorry about that)

***this post mentions some non-consensual sex***

So obviously this post talks about rape but also about painful sex and potentially abusive relationships. Do take care if you want to read this. 

Hear my advice for reader who has asked me that age old question ‘does he still like me?’

Advice for a reader on whether having sex with his girlfriend is the right thing to do.

My advice for how to have sex with a man for a woman who’s only had sex with women. It should just be the same right? Why isn’t it?

A question I’ve been asked a lot lately (from young men) is how much masturbation is too much masturbation. So here’s some audio advice from me.

Sex can make a lot of people really anxious and so some people find that cannabis can help but can smoking weed affect sex in a bad way?

Audio advice for someone who has sex with someone else when drunk. 

Audio Bish! Advice for a guy who had sex with someone under age. 

Some advice for when masturbation isn’t working (it’s okay not to masturbate)

Audio advice to a reader who is wondering whether, they are ready for a relationship, now they are in high school.

Audio advice, from Justin, for someone getting pressured into sex from everyone at school.

We sometimes all need help saying no. It’s not just for teens. Listen to Justin give some advice about it.

Advice about how to talk about what it is that you are both into, not just cumming on faces (and about why we shouldn’t try to persuade anyone to do anything).

Reassuring and useful audio advice for a reader who can’t get hard (it’s not because of porn).

How *do* the guys in porn last so long? I asked one. Here’s what he said.

A reader has a question about putting a marker pen up his bum. I say, ‘please don’t, it’s not safe.’

I masturbate to porn. I also masturbate over sexy pics of famous celebrities. They haven’t necessarily consented so is what I do wrong?

How would you suggest dealing with the issue of parents saying, “no sex before marriage?”

Advice for a reader whose friend has been sexually harassing a friend via text (and is pissed off about it).

Advice on how to keep having sex in a long distance relationship. My first audio response! Exciting!

Advice to someone worried that they can’t cum but also that they bleed when they do fingering. 

Advice for a reader who is unsure about whether she should keep getting paid to have sex. Advice on the risks of sex work and how to make it safer.

Advice for some who’s not enjoying sex. What do we really mean by enjoying sex and how do we learn to have it?

Is it possible or a good idea to be friends after a break up?

Frequently asked questions, answered with a pretty picture: “I am freaking out, am I pregnant?”

My advice for a girl in an age gap relationship and whether she should have sex with her boyfriend who she met online.

The first in a series of frequently asked questions, answered with a pretty picture. First up “how can I make her squirt?”

A question about feeling ashamed of erections, sexual desire and being male (which I’ve split into 3 sections).

Advice for someone about feeling anxious about pregnancy, dealing with friends with benefits fall out and life stuff.

Advice about how to deal with being forced and pressured into oral sex. Warning: talks about sexual assault.

Some advice on how to deal with being in a relationship with someone in a relationship and being tired of being used.

Some advice for someone who is feeling confused about sex and relationships after an abusive relationship. Warning contains reference to abuse.

*Contains references to child sexual abuse*

Advice to a reader about how to get support for her friend.

Advice on why sexual attraction might sometimes go in a relationship and how to deal with that.

There are no magic tricks for how to have sex, no matter what your sexuality, as everyone is different every time they have sex …

A reader has injured herself masturbating with an electric toothbrush. Advice from Dr Ranj on the injury and from me on DIY sex toys.

tl;dr – pregnancy is very very unlikely from dry humping, wanking and sex with condoms.

Latest #AskBish is about sexual urges, whether they are ‘normal’ and do women have them?

Advice for a reader about masturbation. Warning: there’s a reference to sexual abuse.

We have sex up to 3 times a day, is he just using me for sex?

Advice to a religious reader on how to give up masturbation and porn.

An occasional column where I get so annoyed by other advice columnists that I try and give better answers (it’s not like I have enough to do) …

Warning. Contains references to sexual assault/rape.

Ask Bish – Your Questions Answered. Advice for someone who’s friend’s boyfriend is forcing them both to give him oral sex.

Ask Bish – Your Questions Answered. Even if we know our stuff about sex, it doesn’t mean we always enjoy it.

Love’s seen as this big heavy do or die type thing. Think harder about your feelings and think of what you would like to change.

Ask Bish – Another reader is worried about being pregnant but there might be other things to worry about too :/

Sex isn’t as easy as some make it out to be …

Ask Bish about how and when balls drop (and why one is lower than the other)

Ask Bish – Your Questions Answered. What might be the causes of a painful clitoris (and when it’s time to tell mum).

If you have different kinds of sex then it’s easier to do it in a position that you both find comfortable.

An ‘Ask Bish’ about arousal and desire but also about being ready for sex, what sex means and what we expect from sex

I’ve watched porn. Is it going to stop me getting a job as a teacher?

My vagina smells and is itchy: is that normal?

My advice for a 13 year old who wants to know whether she’s too young to have sex

Advice for someone who was told by their mum that you have to be in love with someone before you give them a blowjob.

Where to go for a check up for STIs?

Whether under age sex against the law is different to what actually happens. I explain more here.

Advice for someone who hates the way their vagina looks (after ex said it looked bad – that bit made me ANGRY SEX EDUCATOR)

Sexual health services in the UK aren’t just places for you to get condoms, contraception, STI check ups, pregnancy tests and stuff. You can also go to chat about any worries or concerns you have about sex or your sexual health.

Not everyone is a fan of bishUK.com but I answer their questions anyway.

You might have read about penis enlargement techniques. Surgery, jelqing, pills, devices are all explained here as well as tips on being happier with penis size.

Advice for someone who enjoys sex but finds vaginal sex painful.

Advice about why penis in vagina sex shouldn’t be painful, even for the first time.

Advice on why masturbation with an orange marker pen is perhaps not a great idea

Advice for a guy on whether to tell a girl they are bisexual.

I’m often asked by young men whether circumcision makes their penis less sensitive.

There are a lot of myths about how the vagina works, just like there are loads of myths about dick size and orgasms. I explain it here to a worried reader.

Sometimes it can be hard to get hard. Usually this is because we are putting a lot of pressure on penises. Poor penises.

Pregnancy worries from a couple who had penis in vagina sex without a condom but didn’t ejaculate

A young woman worried about why she is bleeding after masturbation, Some background on what this might be but also one of those times when it’s best to get checked out.

Some advice on how to deal with low body confidence and how to overcome this in order to be sexual with someone (whatever ‘sexual’ means)

It’s not easy getting pregnant, and it’s much much much harder getting pregnant if you don’t have penis in vagina sex. Here I try to help de-stress someone who thinks she might be.

Is it ok to lie about your age to someone? Eg to pretend to be older than you actually are.

Some advice about how to deal with feeling guilty about saying no. Remember guilt is just a feeling and we don’t have to act on feelings. Keep saying no, regardless.

Having an orgasm is something we can learn – like juggling

How to deal with the first time fears but also how to deal with the pressure to do it.

Advice on how to make sure that foreskin slides over the penis properly.

Advice on how to deal with delayed ejaculation or orgasm.

We can often feel under pressure to do something by a certain age. This is advice about how to take the pressure off.

Of course it’s OK to have sex with your eyes closed but it can make negotiating what you want harder.

my boyfriend met some female friends a few months ago at work and they hang out weekly. it makes me jealous.

Hello I’m 15 almost 16 and I masturbate at least 3 times a day… How can u help it make it towards where I don’t masturbate so much??

Lots of people want to last longer. There tips on that here but also advice on why it doesn’t matter.

How to deal with big time feelings and someone who wants you but doesn’t

Advice for someone who looked at Bish and found it all a bit scary (that’s cool).

Advice (and links) about what we do and don’t know about ‘female’ ejaculation (ie from the vulva)

A question about trust in relationship but an answer about classism and prejudice.

Is it okay to snog someone under 16?

(an occasional series where I have a go at answering questions sent into other advice columns where, if they had more space, I think they could have given a better answer). I enjoy sex with my girlfriend but can’t ejaculate during sex. We have had sex six times and no matter how much I try I still can’t. Does my masturbation habit cause this? (from here)

Advice about how avoiding rejection is just another way of experiencing rejection.

I’m in an open relationship, and am a little confused about STI testing and how careful to be.

“I’m really scared that my boobs may not be as perfect as others …” Advice on feeling better about your body

Is it okay to fancy a friend: would it ruin the friendship?

If one fancies someone’s ex girlfriend, who was unpleasantly dumped by her ex boyfriend, but the boy in question is a friend of yours, is it wrong to ask her out after a shortish period..?

Just how risky is a blowjob without a condom?

You may have heard about the controversy of Danny Dyer’s advice to a young man in Zoo Magazine (read about it here if you like). But I don’t think that the letter was answered properly, so I’m going to have a go! Be aware though I’m not in the least bit hard, I’ve never knowingly said the word geezer and I actively avoid getting into fights.