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Ask Bish Female Ejaculation

Advice (and links) about what we do and don’t know about ‘female’ ejaculation (ie from the vulva)

I have been sexually active for 5 years now. I have always been very intimate and close with my sexual partner and I feel I have kept it pretty interesting in bed by always trying new positions, outfits, toys, etc…. but the one thing that can’t seem to wrap my head around is trying to get myself to cum. About three years ago I was alone and toying around and it happened. (I was in so much shock I thought maybe I’d busted a pipe or something or seriously lost control of my bladder and felt ashamed. It was about thirty minutes until it finally hit me that females were actually CAPABLE of such things.) Since then I always knew that I was capable of squirting, but I have only ever squirted a handful of times since that event. I have become somewhat infatuated with the idea of trying to figure out how and I have read many internet pages, seen many tutorial videos, and asked many questions but I still feel as though they are always very vague. Men take 2-4 minutes to get off, but for a female ejaculation how long do you think that might take? If I orgasm, I know women can go again for round 2, 3 ect…. but does that mean that women can orgasm before an orgasm with a squirt? Can women ejaculate without an orgasm? Does the amount of female ejaculation depend on the size of your prostate? I believe it normally said that it is a build up of fluid that comes from normally messing with the female prostate… but where is this fluid held before it is ejaculated? and where does this fluid come from?(I read that part of what makes it up is the same solutions found in urine and to a certain extent it more or less is a urine… but is there a tube from the urinary tract to the urethra?) What is the point of this fluid at all? Is it a genetic human error?

Hi

A very interesting question. Unfortunately I won’t be able to give you very many answers simply because we don’t know very much about it as there haven’t been many studies in this area.

What we do know is that some people with vulvas squirt (or ejaculate) fluid from their urethra when they are sexually excited (often when they are having an orgasm). It’s thought to be prostatic fluid (similar in some ways to semen). Many people have confused ejaculation with peeing because it comes from the urethra. We don’t know for sure why this happens or if there is a biological purpose for it. Many people report that they ejaculate after lots of G-spot stimulation (which is inside the vagina on the front wall, around where the prostate is). Not all people can do this but some do a lot. Squirting doesn’t necessarily mean a better orgasm.

Sorry to be a bit vague about the whole thing! Here is an article about it, here’s another, here’s another and here’s a podcast about it from Kinsey Confidential

6 thoughts on “Ask Bish Female Ejaculation

  1. One of the most frustrating things for a sexually active guy is when he can’t get a girl to climax through intercourse alone. As much as I love to go down on a girl and use my hands and fingers to stimulate her, there is nothing quite like making her thrash, writhe, scream and squirt by doing nothing more than thrusting in and out of her intensely.
    For any guy who isn’t getting it done through intercourse alone, sometimes it is difficult to figure out just what is going wrong. What could you be doing to get her over the edge that you aren’t right now?
    If you’re having trouble getting your girl to climax intensely through intercourse alone, here are three steps you can take to remedy the problem.

  2. Fair enough, females *can* “ejaculate”.

    Bear in mind this however: Space and volume. The female para-urethral glands are necessarily smaller than the male ones. (Why? Because her urethra is rather shorter, isn’t it?) There are no other glands hidden away somewhere to produce this ejaculate. The only place it can build up is in the urethra, and that has very little space. The male urethra can hold up to 5 millilitre if it is forced to (hold the end shut while peeing, “turn off” the pee – ouch – let go of the end, measuring how much comes out), and normal “spurts” may be about 1 millilitre to a total of from three to maybe ten millilitres maximum.

    Note also – semen is not produced as it is ejaculated – this is an amount *stored* (which is why an ejaculation soon after, will be nowhere near as much).

    One other thing – the reason semen is ejaculated in spurts, is partly because it is *thicker* than urine (or water). This permits an actual amount to *collect* in the urethra in order for contractions of the pelvic floor muscles to squeeze it out in sudden spurts. Something such as urine flows out much more readily and will not be able to be projected as far.

    All in all, the female has *much* less space to produce ejaculate, and *much* less space to hold it to build up a “spurt”. It follows that any amount which rivals a spurt of semen, and any amount which totals more than five millilitres, *cannot* be true ejaculate because there is nowhere for it to *come from*. The only *other* thing in the region, is urine and there is no shortage of that. It’s a simple fact of anatomy; *all* the videos you see of anything more than a few dribbles of ejaculate – are urine. This is also revealed by the fact that they are prolonged “squirting” rather than the “spurting” which corresponds to the contractions of orgasm.

    1. As I say the science is still pretty new around this, but the fluid that is ejaculated from the urethra is (usually) not urine. See the articles I’ve referenced above and the work of Dr Beverley Whipple (great name). Some women ejaculate a lot of fluid.The fluid comes from the female prostate (formerly known as the Skene’s Gland). Researchers think that it is a similar size to the male prostate and surrounds the urethra. For more about this http://bishuk.com/2009/07/24/female-sexual-body-parts

  3. Well, I’m quite happy to pass on my now growing knowledge on this subject if you want! I have done quite a bit of research into this phenomenon, helped no ends by an open minded urologist acquaintance (female) who has pointed me in the right direction on more than one occasion!
    The fluid is secreted by the para-urethral glands, its primary function is to drain out of the urethra and into the vagina where it will eventually mix with semen to provide sperm with a pH friendly environment in which to swim.
    ALL women secrete this ejaculate, it’s just that some of us make rather more than is required! Those of us that do will find that the surplus “backs up” into the urethra, it is then expelled by the muscular contractions that accompany a climax (NB: the word is CLIMAX, not orgasm, we can have any number of climaxes but usually only one orgasm!). In my prime, I could get the ejaculation to spurt our 3 or 4 or even 5 feet! I could also have up to 10 “wet” climaxes in succession on my way to my orgasm. But I have never ejaculated during an orgasm!
    The fluid id clear, odourless and usually tastes a bit “salty”. It doesn’t stain sheets other than to leave a faint watermark, if anyone has any doubts that they are peeing themselves, just check the sheets when dry, if there is a yellow stain, then you have most likely peed involuntarily during the heat of the moment! (Try going to the toilet and emptying your bladder before sex/masturbation, that way you will be sure that any fluid you produce is not going to be urine).
    This risks turning into a lecture, so I’ll stop here, but if you have any questions, please feel free to ask!

    1. i have definitely had “wet” climaxes but don’t think I’ve ever truly had an orgasm. is there anything you can tell me on how to get there?

      1. I think you might be confusing ejaculation with orgasm, they are not the same thing. A lot of people don’t ejaculate when they orgasm, particularly, but not only, those with vulvas. Also a lot of people don’t orgasm if they ejaculate – this is true for people with penises and people with vulvas. If you want to have an orgasm I have more advice about that here if you want to learn more about ejaculating you can try here

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