Sex can make a lot of people really anxious and so some people find that cannabis can help but can smoking weed affect sex in a bad way?
Can smoking weed effect sex cuz ma gf told me it can make it worse or something? i aint sure it does owt tho?
So let’s see what Frank (kinda like BISH but for drugs – and funded by the government) says about weed:
“Taking cannabis can make people feel chilled out, relaxed and happy, and they may get the giggles or become very talkative … It can make you more aware of your senses, and the hallucinogenic effects can even give you a feeling of time slowing down.”
Sex can really stress people out, so it’s no wonder people like to smoke weed first
Sex can make a lot of people feel really stressed, anxious, and unhappy and not very talkative. Also, probably related to this, it can also make you less aware of your senses and everything can happen so quickly that you might not have time to enjoy it. So, you know, that’s why a lot of people smoke weed and have sex.
Much of the content here at BISH is about how we can be less stressed about how we feel about sex, our bodies and our relationships with other people. For instance you might be more chill about a sexual encounter with someone if were able to communicate what you wanted with each other. You might be less anxious about sex if you knew that it was the right decision for you, or you had a better relationship with your body. If you were able to be present and to focus on what’s happening in your body, rather than doing sex in the way that you’ve been told that you should, then you might be more aware of your senses and you might be able to take your time and enjoy it more (unlike Will and Charlotte in the Inbetweeners).
Not everyone finds this easy to do – sex can be a big deal for a lot of people, particularly if they have had bad experiences in the past. If you’re really struggling with this you could talk to your local free and confidential sexual health service about seeing a psycho-sexual counsellor (though there may be a waiting time).
So you don’t need to take cannabis to be able to enjoy sex. This is good because cannabis isn’t something that everyone likes and it might not be doing you good. According to Frank cannabis can affect how your brain works, has been linked to mental health problems and (in the UK at the moment) is illegal.
Just as with alcohol, if you needed to smoke a spliff every time you have sex then this can get expensive. It can also takeaway some of the spontaneity around sex if you are needing to have a drug to have sex before you do it, or if you only have sex after you have taken a drug. This might affect how much you and a partner might be enjoying sex. If (as Frank says above) it might start to affect your mental health then this can affect how you feel about your body and sex. If you start to get anxious or paranoid about sex then it can make it much harder for you to want to enjoy sex or for a partner to enjoy sex with you.
Depending on how much you take (or how high, or stoned, or drunk you are) you might find some kinds of sex to be more difficult. If you’re into the whole penetrative sex thing (not everyone is by the way and not everyone enjoys it) then being under the influence of a drug may make it harder to get aroused (for penises and clitorises to get erect and for vaginas to relax, expand and get wet). It can slow you down to the point when your body is not as receptive to stimulation as you might normally be.
There’s some research which suggests that smoking generally can make it harder to get hard (for penises but also, I guess, for clitorises too) because of the damage it can do to your cardio-vascular system. If you are having sex to try and get pregnant, Frank says: “It is reported that frequent use of cannabis may affect fertility. It can cut a man’s sperm count and can suppress ovulation in women” (though that sentence would still make sense without the words ‘man’ and ‘women’ – just sayin’).
So what’s the answer? Can it affect sex? That’s up to you to decide. People’s experiences with sex and drugs (or alcohol) are very individual. Are you happy with the sex you are having? Do you meet each other’s needs? Are you able to slow down and enjoy what you both want to enjoy? Perhaps think about the last few times you’ve had sex – what happened? Maybe if you keep a sex diary or draw a graph for how enjoyable the sex has been for the past few times you might have a clearer picture of how it’s been for you? How is your girlfriend feeling about it? Is she enjoying it? Does she think that you smoking weed is having an effect on your sex life? Maybe this isn’t really about weed and she just wants to say that maybe sex isn’t as good be or once was?
© Justin Hancock, 2017