Your genitals are unique, as you can see in these drawings (by the most excellent Stuart F. Taylor). Warning, genital drawings ahead!
If you would like some detailed information about the clitoris and vagina or the penis and testicles then go and hit those links, but this post is about showing how actually there aren’t as many differences between these kinds of genitals as you might think.
Some are bigger some are smaller. Some have more skin than others. Some are hairier than others. Some bits stick out more than others.
You probably knew this right. But did you know how much they can vary? The differences are so big that sometimes there are more similarities between a penis and a clitoris than two penises or two clitorises.
Internally there are actually lots of similarities between all genitals. For example penises and clitorises are really similar. They both have glans, which can be very sensitive, and they both get hard by blood being trapped in spongy tissue.
If you look at the rest of my posts about bodies here there’s a lot lot more about this kind of stuff. But despite this not all bodies like the same things.
All Genitals Work Differently
You’ve probably been taught that sex = penises going inside vaginas ???? (so hetero). A lot of people don’t enjoy this kind of sex because of their genitals.
Vaginas are often not long enough or stretchy enough to be penetrated. Sometimes penises are too big or too small to fit inside someone. A lot of people find that even though they can do ??? they find it a bit meh — more about this here.
The only time that this would be a problem is if you were auditioning to be a porn star. If you’re not, there are lots of other kinds of sex that people much prefer: sometimes not involving genitals at all.
Your Bits Change Over Time
Your bits can change a lot too. Over the course of a day your bits might shrink or get bigger because of the temperature. Often they change colour. They look very different when they are aroused to when they are relaxing.
They can also look different over weeks, months or years too. Like, you might want to trim or grow pubes. Sometimes people want to get piercings. Or to have some skin removed or remodelled*.
(*sometimes people have their genitals altered without their consent — this is known as FGC or FGM and is illegal.)
(hey look, I made a little video about this too!)
Why Is All This Important?
So, you have no idea exactly what is in someone’s pants or how they work. All genitals are different, no matter what their gender is.
So when it comes to sex you can’t assume what someone is going to be into. You have to find out from them. This is something that we should all be doing anyway, because #consent.
Would You Like a Leaflet or Poster?
Do you want to have a leaflet and a poster about this for you to print out? There’s a bonus ‘genitals join the dots’ game too! Click on the image below and head to Bish Training (my website for sex educators) and buy now for just £3.50. You can also play join the dots in my new Book, which costs nothing or £3.
© Justin Hancock (words) and Stuart F. Taylor (drawings), 2017