I’m 20, He’s 15 – Am I in Trouble?

Audio Bish! Advice for a guy who had sex with someone under age. 

This year I met a guy at my local rugby club. I am 20 years old and he looks about the same age. We both noticed a mutual attraction and after a few weeks he made the first move. Once we started talking I found out he was in his high school Ist XV team. But that didn’t seem a problem (legally) because guys in the school 1st XV are usually aged 17, sometimes 16. Until a few weeks ago we had sex for a couple of months before I found out he is actually still age 15. I mean he’s physically a man. He has a deeper voice and bigger muscles than me and i’m quite a big guy.

He told me he was 17 when the topic came up (i.e. when he told me he was still at school). He hasn’t come out to others as gay/bi, but I am not the first guy he’s had sex with. I am his first boyfriend (if 2 months counts as a relationship).

Now I am panicking. He’s really angry at me for dumping him. I’m worried he’ll say something to someone who will realise the age differential. It’s stressing me out! What sort of mess am I in (legally)?

I talk about the law, how maybe he could just explain to the guy what happened (but not to try to persuade him not to go to the Police), how maybe a more gentle break up might be more better and the responsibility you have in an age gap relationship.

The Law and Sex (in the UK) – more on the age when you can and can’t have sex

Age Gap Relationships – advice on how to deal with an age gap relationship

If I’m 16 and She’s 15 – another Ask Bish but from a much closer age gap

How to Break Up With Someone – here’s how to do a break up gently but clearly

Am I Pregnant – sorry. I can’t tell you if you’re pregnant. Please stop asking. Here’s even more advice about that

© Justin Hancock, 2019

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