Advice for if you are having a panic that you are pregnant

Am I Pregnant?

Frequently asked questions, answered with a pretty picture: “I am freaking out, am I pregnant?”

I had sex I'm worried I'm pregnant
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I have no idea if you are pregnant

The most frequently asked question I get is “am I pregnant?” I can’t tell you if you are pregnant or not as I don’t have access to (and don’t want to have access to) your urine. I also don’t have any mind reading or Jedi skills at all. Sorry about that.

However I can tell you the risks. The risk of pregnancy from a penis ejaculating deep inside a vagina is 3.1% per time. Depending on when the sex happened the risk ranges from 0% to 9%. The risk of pregnancy from pre-cum being deep inside the vagina is between 0 and 1%. The risk of pregnancy from any other kind of sex (like humping or masturbating each other) where there was no ejaculation and no pre-cum inside the vagina is like 0%. The questions I get about this are usually from people who are in the latter camp.

If you’ve had penis in vagina sex

If you’ve had unprotected penis in vagina sex you can get emergency contraception which prevents pregnancy if used within 5 days of sex. If it’s after that you can just wait for your period to arrive. If it arrives, you’re not pregnant. If it doesn’t arrive you can take a test straight away (involves peeing on a stick). If you don’t know when your period was due you can just wait till 21 days after sex (each test is different, so check the packaging to see when you can take it).

Emergency contraception and pregnancy tests are available for free from your local sexual health service in the UK.

If you’ve had non penis in vagina sex

If you’ve had non penis in vagina sex, let’s face it, you’re probably not pregnant. However often people still worry about this even when I tell them that. So you might want to think about how you deal with worrying (because being told not to worry is often not very helpful). Try to remember that the ‘I’m definitely pregnant from ….’ is the anxiety part of your brain telling you a story. Our brains tell us lots of stories that aren’t true – but we don’t have to believe them. Try distancing yourself from the story.

Also seek support from mates, partners, parents or even a sexual health service who all might be able to help you stay calm and not get overwhelmed. I’ve written this article on how to deal with stress. You might also want to check out this page about anxiety and how to deal with it. It’s well good.

For more help about pregnancy panics

How to deal with stress

Self care – how to look after yourself when you’re feeling anxious or stressed.

Fertility – where you can read about just how hard it can be to get preggers

Dry humping – why it can be so good

Condoms – they help prevent pregnancy, amiright?

Contraception – if you want to be super sure you don’t get pregnant

Is your partner putting you at risk – what to do if your partner doesn’t care whether you get pregnant or not

© Justin Hancock, 2020.

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22 thoughts on “Am I Pregnant?

  1. My boyfriend and I decided to try to have sex for the first but it didn’t work out. Even when we are doing oral, we always using protection just in case. Better to be safe than sorry. But my boyfriend had a condom on and stuck some of his penis (just the tip) but didn’t fully push inside of me and he never ejaculated in me at all. I am 9 days late. I’ve had this issue back in January and had taken some pills Provera back in February as I had also taken the double the pills. I don’t feel sick or whatever but I am worried about this. I took 3 test and they all came out negative. My cycle is usually about 35 days or so. Should I even be worried?

  2. Hi,
    I dry humped my boyfriend naked. Before we did that I gave him two blow jobs. The app I track my period on says I wasn’t ovulating. My cycle is on average 34 days. We did this six days before my period was supposed to start. I’m now 9 days late. I took a test and it says negative but I’m just worried that there may have been traces of sperm or pre-cum that got transferred when we rubbed against each other. I know stress delays periods, and I have been stressing a lot. Borderline panic attacks. I’m just worried. Thank you.

    1. I know that you’re stressed out, so first of all let’s deal with that. Sit in a chair or lie down on the floor and have ten breaths. Just focus on breathing. Notice your belly expanding as you breathe in and how it contracts as you breathe out. Feel a bit heavier each time you breathe out. After that, go back through the article note down the really important information. Imagine you are me giving you advice: what would you say?

      Justin

  3. Hi,
    My girlfriend gave me a blowjob(I didn’t ejaculate) then i kissed her and the i went down on her. All this happened on the 9 the day after the first day of her period. That month she had her period(after the incident) but she didn’t have her period the following month but she had a lot of changes in her schedule like she took up exercises and there were exams that month. Can she be pregnant?

    1. She can’t be pregnant from what you describe. As I said in the article above, it’s an average of 3.1% chance of pregnancy from a penis fully ejaculating inside a vagina once. The chance of pregnancy from pre-cum deep inside the vagina is closer to zero. What do you think the chance of pre-cum being in her mouth, her transferring that pre-cum into your mouth, and then you transferring that pre-cum deep into her vagina?

  4. Maybe I was thinking I am having cramps coz I lift heavy objects everyday like 60kilogram. Though we dry humped and rubbed to feel our genitals parts but never remove the undies and 2 cycling am o going to get pregnant of this? Promise this is the last question answer me asap

    1. I’ve already answered your question. If he ejaculated inside your vagina there is a 3.1% chance of pregnancy. Penis in vagina sex without ejaculating inside is close to 0%. Dry humping with pants on can’t get you pregnant.

  5. Hi me and my boyfriend dry humped on the last day of my period. I am wearing underwear and 2 cycling while he was wearing brief and 1 cycling. I became wet and I saw my panty has yellow on it. A day after our dry humped my period was finished but I felt a little bit cramps. I asked him many times if he precum or ejaculated but he says no. I’m really worried coz this is the first time having cramps after my mens period.

        1. I’ve got no idea what that is. Discharge from vaginas is normal. It changes colour and consistency throughout the menstrual cycle. I’m afraid I’m not a doctor so I can’t diagnose why your discharge is that colour or why you have abdominal cramps. All I can say us that the sex that you describe couldn’t have resulted in pregnancy.

  6. Hi! I am 21 so I understand that I am responsible for my actions with the opposite sex. I went on a date with my boyfriend and we decided to have sex for the first time together but alcohol was involved. I was on my period, but the downside about that is my period only lasts 3 to 4 days, and it was a spur of the moment decision so we didn’t have a condom. I haven’t had sex previously in maybe 2 years so it was very uncomfortable for me so after a few tries we stopped. He didn’t come and I am still bleeding so I’m Thinking im okay. I just would like a little clarification on how possible it is for me to get pregnant. Pre- ejaculation is my worry. And the lack of ability to get contraception. So I will have no choice but to wait it out.

    1. I think I’ve explained that pretty well in the article above. Your chances of pregnancy are much much lower if he didn’t ejaculate inside you. Sex during your period might have a lower risk of pregnancy if you usually have a long menstrual cycle (like 28 days). But if you have a shorter menstrual cycle (under 20 days) then you might be at a higher risk. There’s more about this at my page about fertility Fertility Explained – chances of getting pregnant

  7. Hi Bish, so if I sucked my boyfriend’s penis for a few seconds (he didn’t ejaculate) and *if* he touched the tip of his dick then fingered me a few seconds later- what are my chances of pregnancy? Thanks Justin

    1. Pretty much zero I would say. As I say above, it’s 3.1% for full ejaculation fully inside the vagina, less than 1% for pre-cum fully inside the vagina, so even if there was pre-cum on the tip of his penis this would be pretty much zero. Hope that helps! Justin

      (PS please tell your friends about BISH!)

  8. I dry humped my boyfriend without clothes, he didn’t ejaculate anything and neither did anytime his penis buried inside me, but I’m not sure if there was precum. Even if it was there then it would have been in the outside region of my vagina. Should I be worried?

    1. No I don’t think you should be worried and if you have a look at the graphic above you can see the estimated risk of pregnancy from what you describe (it’s very very low).

  9. hello everyone, i wanna say something & its really important so i need you to focus on it please.
    lets start, i’ve dry humped my boyfriend few times, and my period was late for 9 days. i kept freaking out and i’ve been stressed out for real. i got tired from stressing myself so i was like screw it ! whatever happens happens..
    i got my period after 9 days late, lemme say the truth its actually happened after i stopped stressing myself about it..
    girls, stress can delay your periods for real, you can’t get pregnant from dry humping, relax & chill, try to stop thinking please & you’ll get your period, trust me i’ve been in the same situation.
    good luck girls <3 !

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I've written "Can We Talk About Consent - A Book About freedom, choices, and agreement." It's about how to choose your perfect pizza, what to watch on TV, who plays in goal, politics, rights, and yeah also a bit about sex. The illustrations are beautiful and hilarious.

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